Today, when my juniors inquired what their most recent Macbeth journal grades where, I was honest: “I’ve had some personal stuff going on that’s taken my attention away from grading. I’ll have them back to you by Monday, and I’m sorry for the delay.”
Most nodded in understanding, and I hope I wasn’t too alarmist, but I was being serious. My car has been in a constant state of breakdown which took up the entire Saturday I’d set aside to grade their journals. I’ve spent the past week playing catch-up and dealing with insurance, the mechanic, and getting ready to buy a new car. I’m exhausted.
But honestly, it’s not just that. It’s making me cringe to type this, but I took on too much. I’m helping with drama. I took on two new little guys who desperately need help with literacy. I agreed to teach that extra elective when the department needed someone in a pinch. I work each night until nearly 10pm and I’m lucky if I get everything done. It feels like everything is slipping, but I don’t know what to let go of because I love everything. I love seeing my younger kids blossom into excited readers. I love to watch my freshmen debate Odysseus’ greatest character flaw. I love helping the shyest, smallest sophomore use the circular saw for the first time.
Something’s got to give. But I just don’t want to let go.